Go Vote

On this brilliant fall day in South Bend, get yourself to the polls and vote, if you aren't one of the early voters that is. And if you're somewhere that it's not so beautiful, vote anyway and then find your free coffee and donut.



This has certainly been an interesting election and I can hardly wait to know the outcome, especially since Indiana is such a toss-up. But as riveting as it has been, I'm glad that the campaign has come to an end except I'll miss the SNL skits, Letterman jokes, and occasional "Daily Show" or Garrison Keillor column. They have kept Karl and me laughing in spite of the sustained bad news on the economy, double wars, and various other frequent frightening reports. I think we keep track of too many newspapers, newscasts, and news web sites.



I had a wonderful break from all of that last week. On another inspiring weather day, Marcia, Jeanne (mother-in-law, poor term for a wonderful woman) and I drove to Fernwood Botanical Gardens near Buchanan, Michigan. They have a cute cafe for lunch serving very good food, and we enjoyed watching the many birds and a lively group of girls eating just outside our window. Then we meandered through the fabulous exibit of Jan Frieden's work that is on display until Thanksgiving. It's a must see of her work that combines beauty, nature, humor, insight, collected items, painting, fabrics, and other interesting bits, all made more than the sum of their parts by Jan's creativity.

My sleep pattern hasn't adjusted to the time change yet, and when I was awake at 4:48 AM (don't you hate digital clocks), I thought I should get up and do something worthwhile. Instead I lay there and practiced my worrying, and I remembered a funny exerpt from "eat, pray, love" which was mostly a beautifully written 331 page whine but with some points that are right on. Author Elizabeth Gilbert is complaining about what her mind does when she can't sleep and she writes, "Like most humanoids, I am burdened with what the Buddhists call the 'monkey mind' -- the thoughts that swing from limb to limb, stopping only to scratch themselves, spit and howl."

She wrote a best seller. I got up and did a load of laundry. My grandmother would say "to each her own taste, said the old woman as she kissed the cow."

Missing You All

Recently I've been thinking of how much I enjoyed being in touch with family and friends during my "it's now all behind me" experience of last year. So I thought I'd occasionally write a blog posting and those of you who are interested can read and respond if you like.

Just to update you on my health since that was the main focus in the past. I had a doctor's visit two weeks ago and the magic number (CA125) is now 6, and I'm regarded as clinically in total remission. After five years I'll be declared cancer free. So I can tell you all again that I think your support, concern and prayers made this wonderful result possible, and you will forever have my thanks.

Since I last wrote I've reached (albeit recultantly) official old age. And if you think you won't be old at 65, just wait until you go through the many steps required to apply for Social Security and Medicare. That in itself is an aging process, and Karl did all the work. I just tried to get my head around the whole "passage" thing.

To try and get back to some acceptable level of fitness following the weakening effects of chemo, I talked Marcia (best friend in the world) into joining me in engaging a personal trainer. We belong to the same health club, so it was an easy thing to accomplish. We are now at the mercy of this sweet, cute, young, very fit task master named Emily who puts us through increasingly hard workouts on a weekly basis. Between sessions with her we walk most days (Charley the Standard Poodle makes sure we don't forget to do that), and we struggle with the gym's torture machines one day. We are getting stronger and if I could stop eating everything in sight, I could probably be happy about how I look. If that is ever really possible for a women.

Speaking of looks, I do have hair. It has come back thick as ever, very salt and pepper in color, and wonder of wonders with a slight wave. Sure saves time and money having no perms or hightlights.

I think possibly only my female family and friends will care about my musings on these resumed postings, so I'll close this first one with a quote from the book I'm currently reading. "I am alive because I worry. When I stop I die." This is a statement from a male character, but I really think it's the women's version of Descartes, "I think, therefore I am." By the way the book is "The Secret of Lost Things" by Sheridan Hay, and I'm finding it very entertaining.

I'll keep you up to date on what I'm worrying about from time to time as the seasons change. More worries in the gray winter than in the sunnier months no doubt, but there is always something. Maybe we can keep each other company during this winter of our financial discontent.

If you're not comfortable responding on the blog for all to see, my email is mebking@aol.com.

Warming up

I’m getting back in the game. Stay tuned.

"The End"

I need to make a New Year's resolution to not procrastinate, especially where simple things are concerned. This is by way of acknowledging that I didn't report on the CT scan as promised. However I have received calls and emails asking what the results were, and that's good because this writing has gotten pretty one-sided. I've not received any responses in quite some time. So you all can resolve to let me hear from you: email mebking@aol.com, call 574-232-3401 or respond on the blog.

Now I have that out of my system. The CT scan was just what I had hoped it would be. All is well and clear, no sign of any cancer. Even though I was fairly confident of that outcome, it was great to get the word from the nurse reading the report. When she said that there was no cancer, I realized I had been a little anxious about it. So now I really do have a new lease on life.

Chemo #7 was today. I think it was the first time Marcia has sat down for more than half an hour since #6. We had our usual good time. Her daughter Mary came in the afternoon, and we played with one of my Christmas presents. It's a game called Brain Age which is aimed at sharpening one's wits. Karl gave it to me, but it wasn't an insult. I keep complaining about all the brain cells that I'm losing to chemo, at least that's my excuse for how addled I feel most of the time. I'm hoping for great improvement, but actually I'm not so bad. Marcia and I both tested at a brain age of 36. Now if we just could find those 36 year old bodies.

Today's CA125 was 8.5. So that is more good news. And, Dr. Method is very pleased with how I'm doing. He says that I'm a model patient as all the treatments are doing just what they should. My last treatment (doesn't that have a good ring to it?) will be on Jan. 18, 2008. Then I'll have a check-up every three months for at least a year. If all is well then the time between checks will lengthen.

So I wish all of you wonderful family and friends and faithful readers a Happy New Year! I'm looking forward to my next year being ever so much better than the one just ending. My other resolutions include losing the weight I've gained and returning to the fitness level I had before this all started.

It has been great reconnecting with those of you who had been out of touch for too long, and I've certainly enjoyed hearing from the many who have contacted me. But I am going to have the end of the year be the end of my posting the blog on a semi-regular basis. I will write if there are any big events to report, but this is my sign-off for now.

I do want to tell everyone again how much your thoughts and prayers have meant to me. I'd never have gotten through this journey with the good outcome had you all not been with me. Thank you, thank you and thank you again.

Holiday Spirit!

Good morning, all.

So who is in the Christmas spirit and has all their shopping complete? To anyone who answers "yes" to the shopping part, I don't like you quite as much as I used to, but congratulations nevertheless.

Chemotherapy #6 was on Tuesday this week. That meant an "up" day on Wednesday, when I was pretty productive. A "down" day Thursday, saved only by a fair amount of sunshine, but little was accomplished. Friday was quite good and included a fun visit from Susan Naus, a long-time friend not seen recently. Today is good so far with hopes of getting some decorating done.

Karl had a long meeting yesterday morning, so I took Charley (the poodle) for a good walk--nearly a mile and a half. I felt better for it, and heaven knows I need the exercise to help balance the continued voracious appetite.

Here's a comic that seems to fit perfectly with my situation. Hope you enjoy it as much as I did. I really like the comic strips which often provide the highlight of my day for humor at least.



I seem to have jinxed myself on the good CA125 number by being so proud of last time's 8.7, because it's up a bit to 11.7. I'm told that is nothing to worry about because it will fluctuate before settling on a final number that will be the one future tests will compare to. As promised by Dr. Method, I'm scheduled for a CT scan. He does that after the sixth treatment as a double check that all is well at the site of the former cancerous tumors. That's on the 17th. I'll report.

Wishing all of my family and friends a peaceful holiday season with a quote from a recent note from Jan Frieden: "May the spirit of Christmas wrap round you and give you strength for healing". This could easily be modified to "strength for living joyfully".

Happy Thanksgiving

Since it's Thanksgiving (my favorite holiday because there are no presents to buy and the menu is preset), I think I can get a little sappy in this entry. So here goes.

When I count my blessings, it's hard to know where to begin…so I think I'll start with you all. It has meant so much to me during these four months to know you're all thinking of, praying for, and wishing me well. Without all the cards, emails, calls, visits, delicious meals, presents, and maybe most of all hugs and kisses, I know that I would not be doing as well as I am. Thank you, thank you, and thank you again.

I had chemo treatment number five last Thursday (I know I'm late with this missive). Then on Friday I had a short, but wonderful visit with Susan Lindsay, who was my maid of honor forty-two years ago. She came to South Bend from Jackson, MS, with her son who was speaking to a group at Notre Dame, just so she could see me. It has probably been more than twenty years between face-to-face encounters, so it was very special. We went to lunch at the Bistro at the Morris Performing Arts Center so I could show her what I spent twelve years of my life working on. She, too, thought it was worth the time and effort.

When I arrived home I thought I needed a nap. Two and a half hours later I woke up to realize I had missed my appointment for the post-chemo injection I was to get, and as result didn't get the CA125 number until Monday. It is a great one though – 8.7 to be exact. So those toxic chemicals are really doing their job. Who knows, maybe I will get to zero.


Now I want to add part of a commentary from USA Today written by Alcestis "Cooky" Oberg about what we have to be grateful for. But first I need to say that this absolutely does not mean I'm in any way giving my family short shrift because I love and need them everyday, but I have some outstanding friends.

On Thanksgiving, families gather together and express gratitude for the bounty in their lives.

But what is a family these days? Of course, it's parents, children and siblings — blood relatives. But with American families becoming so mobile, so scattered and so displaced, many people form close family-like attachments to friends, making them siblings by choice, brothers and sisters of life.

Perhaps this year, the prosperity we celebrate at Thanksgiving should not only be for the material riches of our lives but also for the human ones. After all, the bounty of living may not just be the abundance of goods spilling out of the cornucopia of life, but the richness of the relationships we have cultivated and harvested in our lifetime.

In recent studies, scientists have found that close friendships are very important factors to our health. In a longevity study in Australia, researchers found that a network of good friends was more important than family and economic prosperity in increasing the length of a person's life, especially among the aged. Friends help each other weather the vicissitudes of life — death of spouses, bouts of poor health, and so on. Other studies have indicated that friends reduce stress and provide emotional support through inevitable ups and downs.

Everyone has gathered best friends — an old school chum here, a trusted colleague from work there, or some wonderful person met by pure happenstance. These friends are people we can confide in, speak our hearts to — and to whom we listen intently for solace, inspiration and advice. They are our chosen family — the brothers and sisters of our souls — who clarify and define who we are, what we are doing. And these friendships never change: To speak after a decade's separation is the same as speaking just yesterday, time and distance rendered meaningless in our life journey together.

When we sit down to our feast of Thanksgiving this year, we should give thanks for that other family, that chosen family — our human harvest of enduring friendships. And they're easy to name, too. They're the ones who made a difference. "No love, no friendship," wrote Nobel Prize winner Francois Mauriac, "can cross the path of our destiny without leaving some mark on it forever."

I hope that all of you have as meaningful a Thanksgiving as I do. My list of blessings this year goes on and on.

Hello, Great Friends and Family

Here I am at four down and four to go. The half-way point is a pretty good place to be in a series of chemotherapy treatments. This past Thursday's session was a little different from the others because Marcia was out-of-town. Karl, always there when I need him, was my main support, and I had a great parade of friends throughout the day. This included Peggy King and Nancy King (not related), but since we've called ourselves "The King Sisters" from time to time it was fun to have us all there together. Mary Jan Hedman followed and Mary Downes rounded out the day. They brought food and presents, and I'm not sure if the other people in the chemo room found us entertaining or obnoxious, but it made the six-hour day go faster for me.

My CA125 number keeps going in the right direction. It's now 11.8, and as I mentioned last time anything under 10 is my goal, so I should definitely get there soon.

Overall things continue to go well for me. Appetite still too good, and fatigue continues to slow me down. I am reminded that during the years I worked on raising funds for the restoration of the Morris Performing Arts Center, I always said that I was much more a tortoise than a hare. It took us ten years to raise about $9million, but I never quit. Now I must characterize myself as a snail but not a total sloth yet, it just takes me so long to get things done due to frequent rest breaks.

As you see I am not writing frequently anymore, but I'll keep you all posted after each chemo. The next one is November 15. Until then Happy Halloween! Which reminds me, I now think my hair looks a lot like Linus's. Hail the Great Pumpkin!